Fish or cut bait

To say that I've been depressed about my running as of late would be an understatement. Despondent would be a more apt description. Here it is summer, when I have no classes to teach, no pressing obligations, no hectic schedule, and yet I still find it almost impossible to stick to my training schedule and get my mileage in. Classes start up in a few more weeks at which point all free time will disappear. I'll be faced with the same (if not worse) situation as last fall where I barely eked out enough training to cross the finish line for the marathon. I didn't like the way I finished last year. It was hard, I didn't feel well, and there was some serious doubt in the last 6 miles that I was going to make it at all. But that's what happens when you don't train well. Now it's one year later, I'm another year older (which doesn't make it any easier), and at 4 weeks into my training I'm falling apart. How can I possibly expect to succeed??? I believe the time has come to fish or cut bait.

I could never quit running altogether. My already increasing waistline tells me that. But this last weekend, when faced with a long run of 7 miles that I was unsure I could complete, I thought long and hard about continuing on with my training. I could just run 3-5 miles 3-4 times a week to try and stay in shape and forget about the marathons and other races. I had pretty much settled on that idea but there was this little voice in my head that said "Why don't you just go out and try for 7 miles and see how far you get". The little voice won out. This time. But honestly, I just don't know what's going to happen in the coming weeks. If I let things slip any more than I have already it would be foolish to even try to run in the marathon come November. I'm not a rookie - I know what it takes. So I guess I'd better get serious about this fishing or ditch the worms and find something else to do with my time.